bilder · Hverdag

PÅSKESHOW OG FUGLER I BUR

BEF3F267-32CA-4D99-AFE5-39670232A4C5

Det har vel egentlig ikke føltes som påske i år, men sånn var det når det var jul her også. Jeg vet ikke helt hva som spiller størst rolle, været eller det at jeg er så langt borte? Åh, jeg gleder meg sånn til å kunne være nærmere alle sammen ❤

Dan og jeg dro til “Sydney Royal Easter Show” her om dagen. Det er litt som en fornøyelsespark, deler av det i hvert fall, med masse forskjellige karuseller, boder, og butikker. De hadde liksom alt mulig der. Det var litt kaos og umulig å finne fram til tider, men det var gøy å se så mange mennesker samlet.

3C242D36-CA32-45E7-969A-6959AA357CF1

Ellers var det noe jeg virkelig ikke likte. De hadde et svært område/bygning med fullt av høner og ender i bur. Jeg tror de har blitt brukt for utstilling(?), ettersom de hadde vunnet 1.,2. plass osv. Jeg vet ikke om det var eggene deres eller hvordan de så ut som avgjorde om de hadde vunnet eller ikke… De hadde også egg på “utstilling”. Klarte ikke helt å sette meg inn i akkurat hvordan det foregikk, men bra for dyrene var det ikke – det er helt klart. De var i små bur og ble redd når folk gikk forbi, spesielt unger som skreik og ville røre og se. Kanskje har de det “bra” når de ikke er der de dagene (tviler), men det er uansett så sykt unødvendig å sette opp noe sånt. Det var også noen sauer vi så helt på slutten, som hadde alt for liten plass å gå rundt. De var alle helt oppi hverandre på en veldig liten gressbit. Hvorfor?? Er så sykt lei av at mennesker fortsetter å være så sykt egoister når det kommer til dyr. Hvis hunder har det vondt er det helt jævlig, men alle de andre spiller ingen rolle. Tok noen bilder slik at dere kan se hvordan det var.

F6CB26F3-07A3-41E1-B2EF-CA5E5D178E9E

Skjønner ikke at slike “eventer” alltid må involvere å putte dyr i unaturlige situasjoner der det er klart at de ikke trives i det hele tatt. Blir så sint. Det var også to kyllinger som nesten sloss, lagde veldig høye lyder og virket utrolig stresset – så står det selvfølgelig en barnefamilie som filmer og ler. Det er så utrolig frustrerende at voksne mennesker kan ha så stor mangel på kunnskap og empati når det kommer til dyreliv.

Har dere noen meninger om dette? Og gjerne del hva dere gjorde i påsken, jeg vil høre! ❤ 

Fakta · Lister

RARE FAKTA OM MEG

Hei og god påske ❤ Jeg tenkte å dele et veldig typisk blogger-innlegg med dere. Litt facts om meg – som jeg tenker de fleste ikke vet. Let’s go!

  • Jeg pusser ofte tennene når jeg dusjer. Altså jeg gjør det jo alltid når jeg står opp og legger meg, men hvis jeg feks. dusjer midt på dagen gjør jeg det også da. Jeg liker nok å pusse tennene mer enn gjennomsnittet, spesielt når jeg har en god tannkrem. Haha syking. Tannkrem er livet.

  • Jeg tenker ofte på døden og generelt menneskenes eksistens. Mange av mine tanker går ut på hvor små vi er og hvordan vi har laget alt dette rundt oss, et liv som består av å leve for papirlapper, forventninger om hvordan et menneskeliv skal leves, hvordan vi bryr oss så utrolig mye av hva andre mennesker synes. Hvis jeg i det hele tatt nærmer meg tanker som “åh nei men hva synes de?” – stopper jeg meg selv med en gang og minner meg selv på; om 100 år er vi alle borte, det har da INGENTING å si om du vil ha sex med to på en kveld eller om du synes rosa hår er kult eller om du får sparken fra jobben din. Ikke som regel mine dilemmaer nødvendigvis, men dere skjønner hva jeg mener. Vi er så utrolig små i det store og hele, og det gjelder ikke bare for deg, det gjelder akkurat like mye for “Sara” som sitter hjemme å slenger dritt om deg liksom. Jeg føler at livet endrer seg den dagen du innser at voksne fortsatt ikke har ting på stell, at alle mennesker går igjennom dritt og at det ikke er synd på deg, og at når du en dag mister noen for godt virkelig kjenner på hvor skjørt livet er. Alle mennesker har akkurat lik verdi – du er ikke mer spesiell eller mindre spesiell. Du er sykt heldig som får noen år her i verden fordi det er ingen selvfølge. Så slutt å bry deg om hva “Sara” sier, slutt å være redd for “autoritet” fra mennesker som liksom er “høyere opp” enn deg – det er bare noe vi mennesker selv har laget en visjon om. Vær takknemlig, vis respekt, speak up og slutt å være så redd for andre eller flau for å være den du er. Du får ikke flere sjanser så grip alle muligheter du har til å være akkurat slik du er.

  • Jeg skriver dikt i blant. Jeg må som regel være i et spesielt humør, men det er noe jeg kan sitte i timesvis å gjøre hvis det er en sånn kveld. Jeg tror helt siden jeg var lita og ikke snakket så mye, bare observerte, så har det vært mye store og små tanker i hodet mitt, og jeg liker å få skrevet det ned på en kreativ måte.

  • Jeg foretrekker å ha en dag der jeg er skikkelig produktiv og gjør masse forskjellig enn en hel dag med film og kos. Jeg trives best når jeg bruker både hodet og kroppen min. Jeg elsker for eksempel å kunne stå opp skikkelig tidlig, være sykt effektiv, for så å ha en koselig kveld med god mat sammen med en av mine nærmeste.

  • Da jeg var lita hadde jeg så sykt lyst til å bli danser. Jeg var nok litt for ukomfortabel når det kom til oppmerksomhet for at jeg kunne bli skikkelig god, men tenker å begynne å lære meg mer nå som jeg er eldre og mer komfortabel med både oppmerksomhet og meg selv. Jeg blir nok ingen proff danser akkurat, men jeg synes det er så teit når mennesker holder seg selv tilbake bare fordi “man skulle ha startet når man var ung” eller “det er for sent nå”. Du har en fungerende hjerne og er fullt kapabel til å lære hele livet ditt, hvorfor skal du IKKE fortsatt lære deg selv nye ferdigheter? Vi har så stor kapasitet som mennesker men er så sykt late når det kommer til å prøve noe nytt og komme oss ut av komfortsonen. Dette er noe jeg tror alle burde bli bedre på! Hvem bryr seg om du er 20 eller 40 liksom, du kan fortsatt bli flink til å tegne, danse eller skrive bok. Som sagt tidligere her oppe; hvem bryr seg om hva “Sara” sitter hjemme å sier om deg? Du blir i hvert fall flinkere til noe 🙂 Hvis dere lurer har jeg heller ingenting i mot noen som heter Sara, det var bare det første som kom opp i hodet mitt… Sorry Sara.

  • Jeg har vært utrolig interessert i krim og skumle historier/hendelser siden jeg var lita. Jeg skrev noen historier og tegnet noen tegninger da jeg gikk i barnehagen/begynte på skolen som kanskje ikke er sånn super vanlig for et barn. Vi har enda en bok jeg skrev i fra den tiden hjemme – vi skulle skrive forskjellige historier i den, og det hadde aldri noe å si for meg hva det måtte eller skulle handle om, jeg endte alltid opp med å slenge inn litt krim og skumle greier i historiene mine. Jeg har alltid på en måte likt å skremme meg selv. Jeg synes jo at true crime podcaster er helt forferdelige når man får høre hva andre mennesker har måtte gått gjennom, men det er fortsatt interresant for meg. Bare det å innse at det finnes mennesker som det, og hva som får folk til å gjøre slike ting. Rart å tenke på det, men alle har vært et uskyldig og hjelpesløs barn en gang i tiden.

  • Da jeg var lita brukte bestevenninnen min og jeg seriøst flere dager på å skrive av alle replikkene i en Mary Kate og Ashley Olsen film fordi vi skulle lage samme film selv med familiene våre. Det ble det rart nok ingenting av.

  • Jeg har alltid helt syke scenarioer i hodet mitt. Jeg kan se for meg at alt mulig kan skje når som helst. Terror, kidnapping, stalkere etc. Det har nok noe med å gjøre at jeg har hørt så mange sanne historier hvor syke ting har skjedd, men det påvirker meg ikke på noen annen måte enn at jeg alltid er litt ekstra obs og tar av meg headsettet når jeg går i tomme sidegater alene på kvelden liksom. Ellers lever jeg livet mitt til det fulle med litt terrorfrykt her og der 🙂 Jeg sjekker også nesten alltid under senga før jeg legger meg. Jeg husker at jeg hørte en gang at en kvinne i Bodø (!!) eller noe hadde funnet en ukjent mann under senga si en dag, og siden det har jeg bare gjort det. Jaja, syk i hodet til tider I guess, men det går fint.

  • Mitt favoritt outfit er bokser og stor t-skjorte. Lucky Dan.

  • Det å dele min historie med selektiv mutisme er det viktigste jeg har gjort i hele mitt liv.

3064AA4A-D30C-4C00-9733-539C6AFCC5B3

Gjerne del noen fakta om deg også! Og er det noe du kan kjenne deg igjen i?

video · vlog

Do I regret moving to Australia?

I wanted to let you guys know my thoughts about moving to Sydney + some vlogging from our day! Watch the whole video and you’ll be lucky enough to see Dan again as well :):)

I hope you enjoy! Leave a comment for more vlogs and don’t forget to subscribe to the YouTube channel for more videos!

Lots of love x

Thoughts

How Can You Be More Productive?

I thought I would share a few things with you guys that I do to be more productive!

For me it’s really important as I almost always have a list of things I want to get done, and sometimes the laziness just kicks in. But the feeling of knowing I could have done so many things but end up with nothing done and everything left by the end of the day is never a good one. The best feeling however – is when everything important is done and you can just spend the rest of the day doing anything you feel like. If you’re struggling a bit I hope this can help!

Processed with VSCO with p5 preset

PLANNING.

This is number one. You need to plan! Everything will go so much more smoothly and you won’t be stressed out trying to do a thousand things at the same time, not even knowing where to start or finish.

My best tip would be to bring out your planner (buy one if you don’t have one), and on Sunday’s you spend some time planning your week. Make coffee, tea and put on some music – you don’t need to spend much time on it and it’s a very good feeling when you’re a bit more organised and prepared for the upcoming week.

I would also recommend just going over and writing down what you want to achieve in the upcoming month when it’s the last Sunday of the month. It keeps you motivated!

WAKE UP EARLY.

Sorry to all the people really struggling with waking up early, but it is honestly necessary to be productive. You’re going to work, but still have a lot of other things you want to get done? You’re trying to create something of your own on the side? You’re trying to finish a book or study more? Maybe you just have tons of different chores and tasks to do? Wake up earlier than the rest of the world. You already know what you have to get done for today, you made the plan and now it’s time to do it. Don’t wait until the evening because you’ll be tired and unfocused – you might not even stick through and do any of it. Your brain is more focused in the morning, you’re rested and ready to learn, grow and achieve new things. The tough thing is actually getting out of bed, but when you’re up -make a nice breakfast, coffee or whatever you like, light some candles and put on some music. It always helps! Yes I do love the coffee and music thing… Works for everything.

Just remember: If you’re working a 9-5 but have a dream about running your own business or just doing something else, don’t forget to prioritize your qualities and strength to your own thing before you go on and use the rest of your energy for someone else’s business. Sometimes that means waking up at 5am. 

GIVE YOURSELF A REWARD.

I mean… It always helps, doesn’t it? It’s not healthy for your body or mind to live your life from a list of things you “need” to do. But there are still things you need to do, that’s just how it is. So give yourself the time of day to just do whatever you feel like. Make sure you don’t sit behind a laptop trying to get something done all day until you just need to go to bed. It depends what you are trying to do in life, but let’s just say you always put aside time for yourself and the ones you love. If you have a job or school and then a also other work that you want to get done for yourself and a business or something else, you set a time for when you stop the “work day” completely. Say that at 18.00 those days – you stop. No more work and no more lists. It’s important for your brain to rest, it’s important for you to feel happy and enjoy every day even though you have things to do. It also makes you work more efficiently that day because you know what time you’ll put all the work away. Also remember that not everyday should be a day where you have “things to do”. Keep some days completely off, from everything. It’s healthy ❤

Processed with VSCO with p5 preset

personal · Thoughts

You Can’t Be Brave Without Being Scared

Dan and I went to see this movie the other day “Eight Grade”, it was a good movie – but most of all was the meaning of it, the message and what it could mean to others. There’s certain things that the main character “Kayla” said that I feel resonates with how I felt as I was trying to put Selective Mutism completely behind me. Mostly in my teens when I did talk to others, but found it really difficult. The movie is not about Selective Mutism, and even though the main character finds it difficult to be herself and talk a lot to the people at her school she does not have Selective Mutism, but I know there’s certain things and feelings being explained in that movie that you for sure have felt yourself if you struggle or have struggled with SM, most likely on a different scale – but it’s just a nice thing being able to listen someone speak and explain things in a more childlike way, somehow it becomes more real and honest.

This was said in the movie;

“I’m really like nervous all the time. … It’s like I’m waiting in line for like a roller coaster and that stupid like butterflies-in-your-stomach feeling you get. I get that all the time. And then I never get the feeling after you ride the roller coaster.”

I remember walking around constantly feeling this way. There was never a moment to relax and not think or worry about anything and everything. And it just kept on going like that.

She also talked about confidence.

“A big part of confidence is being brave, and you can’t be brave without being scared”

At the end of the movie she said these words, amongst others like “pretend you have confidence and that will somehow generate real confidence”.

That is something I felt I had to do as I was trying to get rid of my anxiety when I was younger. I believed in myself, always, but I did not have a lot of confidence in doing anything or saying anything when I was around others. So I just started pretending. It sounds so easy, but it feels like the most difficult thing in the world for people struggling with Selective Mutism – pretend you have confidence? How are you supposed to do that when you can’t say a word, right?

Like I said this is what I started doing after I had challenged myself for years with the little things, that I’ve talked about previously – the small steps that matters the most. After getting through it I was able to be myself a bit more, or at least answer and have short conversations. I knew I had to challenge myself on different levels if I wanted to get to where I one day saw myself. I was in my teens at that time. I saw people around me daily do and say things and not even think twice about it, so I started saying to myself I could do it to – I should do it because then one day I might even be like them – just fully be myself and not be one bit concerned or worried about it, because I knew in my heart there really wasn’t any reason to be.

And just remember it’s not always going to be comfortable, nice feelings, a safe environment… In the moment it might feel worth it to stop challenging yourself so you don’t have to face those feelings, face the unsafe and scary – but it’s so important to keep telling yourself this is what makes me grow, makes me better and stronger. Like I always think – people are just people, who cares? We won’t be here for long so just be yourself and enjoy the great things in life, share your opinions and be proud of who you are. Life’s too short. Take on the challenges and don’t be too hard on yourself along the way. You can do anything. You just have to believe it yourself.

fce2b7b8-a1f2-455b-b8fc-cf60aa310507

personal · Thoughts · traveling

First Day of 2019 – Thoughts

I’ll be honest. First day of 2019 and I haven’t ever felt more lost. It’s how it goes though isn’t it? In your twenties you’re a bit lost and then you find yourself? I have always known what I wanted to do next, where I want to go next, why I am where I am and doing what I am doing, but now – I have no idea.

W-1-2 copy

Photo: Mila Ritz

I am thankful and grateful that I got to share my story last year, and be some kind of support for anyone struggling with Selective Mutism. That I had my first talk about it and that my Mom and I finally got to experience the support from others ourselves, even though I don’t have it anymore it was such an emotional experience. This is my most cherished moment from last year. I will keep working even harder this year!

I moved to Oslo with Dan. Somewhere I never thought I would have enjoyed, but turns out – I did have some amazing months. I also finally got to live closer to my best friend, and even though it didn’t last for long I really appreciated being able to have her so close. I also made some amazing friendships – we didn’t get too much time, but the time we had gave us something to keep for years on and for that I am thankful. I loved being able to be closer to my mom, just a quick flight away and I was home, back to the safest place I know, right next to her ❤ I was also closer to the rest of my family – my brother, dad, aunts, cousins, and my little niece… I went through some tough times and lost my Grandpa, and to be honest it’s still very heartbreaking to think about. If my Oslo time taught my anything it’s that my family means everything to me. We don’t have all the time in the world and I just want to spend the time I’m given with them around me. Everyone’s getting older and I just don’t feel like being so far away all the time. So you could probably ask what the hell I’m doing on the other side of the world? I couldn’t even tell you, but I think my restlessness just had to get me here. And that’s probably the biggest reason for why I’m feeling so lost right now. What am I doing so far away? It’s not like I haven’t done it before, it just feels different this time.

I also tried Miss Norway, which I am thankful for because I figured out I really had something to share – my story with SM meant something so much bigger than I ever thought, but it also just made me experience once again how messed up this world is. Old men convincing girls to pay and give them money to be in a pageant that claims to “be more than just about beauty” because you have to have a “case” to fight for – yet if you got them any money the attention was there, but if you made a difference and worked for something bigger it was ignored. I got to the finale and I decided enough was enough. I wrote a blog post about everything I had experienced, and I do really hope other girls read it and learned something from it.

I also started spending more time in the gym with weights and only grew more and more passionate about it. My body has changed – no doubt about it, but so has my mind, and I’m happier than ever just being me.

Dan and I reached our goal this year as well, or should I say goals. We moved to Oslo, worked hard and saved up money so we could go to Australia. I finally got to see Caitlin again, and like we did in London we got the chance to live together again. This time in the cutest apartment. And now we’re here.

It’s nice here, the scenery is beautiful and the weather is amazing. I even love the thunderstorms.

In terms of work I want to be more creative, but the industry seems a lot different over here. Like always I do have some sort of plan for what I am doing and I am very passionate about it, and to be honest right here in Sydney could be a good place to start.

I just don’t know what it is. I struggle to feel like I should be here, that this is the place for me right now. Then again Australia is big and other places might feel different, and I haven’t seen everything even here in Sydney – I just wish the weird feeling would go away.

I’m young and I’ll figure it out. I’m lucky I’m not here completely alone and I got good people around me – which I am so grateful for.

Just because people are traveling and being somewhere completely different than you, sharing photos and experiencing something else – I really don’t want you to think it’s all perfect! It’s tough, and this time it’s much more tougher than I thought it would be – but nothing is wrong with that. Maybe it isn’t for me, maybe I will end up loving it and things will change, but whatever I figure out I just know I’ll have to listen to my true feelings. I’m still staying here for now, and for the rest of 2019 – let’s see what happens. I am incredible grateful to get another year on this earth. I’ll do my best this year – let’s get to work ❤