Photographs

I Can’t Describe It

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Photos taken back in my hometown by my mom. I miss her ❤

I’m kinda stuck with a feeling of not knowing what I’m doing, not even knowing how I feel about Sydney yet. So far it’s been stressful and less free than what I remember when I first moved to London. I know it’s partly because the circumstances are different, but I also know what situations and moments I need. It’s not always the easiest thing even though you know why and how and all that. You probably don’t know what I’m talking about, but I’ll continue writing anyway.  It ‘s so difficult describing what I’m feeling because I really don’t know just now, I’m not sure.

I’m now 22 and it feels weird to be honest. Well only the number I guess. Saying it and writing it. It just doesn’t feel like me. Your age isn’t you, but it’s still weird. I’ve decided this is going to be the year of realising things. Just realising everything. Kidding. I think you know where I was going. But I do want to figure out things. It’s not very specific, I know, but luckily I know what I mean. It’s difficult though. I just feel like there’s so many parts of me, so many passions and it’s all just a bit too blurry. As long as I try and also remember to challenge myself, then possibly end up failing, but for sure learning, then do it again, and eventually get to where I want. Sounds like a plan? I think so.

Something random: Today was the craziest weather day here in Sydney. It was a thunderstorm and I’ve never experienced anything like it. I believe there were quite a few accidents though, at least one very bad, which is extremely sad. I find it so scary how you can just leave home one morning and then never come back again… It’s very true but so upsetting…

I hope the weather was better where you are, and that you’re all good and safe!

personal · Photographs

Self – Love

I want to talk about self-love. About loving yourself. Loving yourself when you’re all alone. Loving yourself without makeup. Loving yourself because you’re unique and you’re you.

We all have insecurities, and when having the type of anxiety I used to have – it was more centered around other people. It is so frustrating being inside your head – and having confidence and self-love, but the second you get out in situations where you feel unsafe, all of that disappears. It used to take a second and I felt like I was robbed of everything I had when I was by myself.

So what happened? How did I push myself enough to have the same feelings about myself no matter who I’m surrounded by? How did I go from being the quiet one who only wanted to be invisible, to someone who loves herself and respect herself?

By being surrounded by my mom growing up I learned to love myself from an early age. I knew my worth and I knew I always had the right to my own opinions. I learned that my voice and dreams was just as important as anyone elses. This could unfortunately never have “saved” me from my anxiety disorder. I had to go through it, but I always had what my mom taught me in the back of my mind.

When I managed to fight the anxiety I was struggling with, and realised what I actually could do – everything changed. I took my confidence outside of home, I started speaking up and I wanted people to hear me. I’m always thinking – you only have this one life, why would you ever waste it by worrying about what other people would say or mean or think about you?! Every single one of us is going to be gone one day, and how will they opinions about you matter then, or ever? Why should it stop you from doing or saying what you want? You need to live your life to the fullest, and it always starts with loving yourself – before anything.

I know there’s so many struggling with this every day – so I wanted to write down some things you might find helpful ❤

* Write down the things you like about yourself. You can even ask your closest what they appreciate and love about you.

* Always remember you only have this one life to share your opinions, stand up for yourself and make a change.

* If someone doesn’t like you? Know that they have their own problems and there’s always a reason for something – they are probably struggling with themselves and it really is sad how that’s the only way they can make themselves feel better. Know it’s not worth any of your attention. Focus on you and your life. They are the ones wasting time.

* You are UNIQUE and no one is like you!

* Find a hobby. Maybe you’re wondering how this will help with self-love? If you spend day by day looking at people and what they are doing with their lives – you won’t feel good about yourself. Pursue something! Do something for yourself, and get good at it – or even just improve. You are capable of so many great things. Do it for yourself and no one else.

* STOP COMPARING YOURSELF! I know people do this every single day. Why do you want to look like someone else?! You are so special. There’s so many inspiring people out there and I get inspired every day, but I would never wanna be them. The world already has one of him or her – I wanna be me because no one else has that. You should own it – it’s so amazing.

Be good, do good – and love yourself.

Photographs · Snapshot

Snapshots In The Sunset

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Needed some new, natural pictures yesterday, so we took some in the sunset. You can quite clearly see my hair colour now for those of you that haven’t as it doesn’t always show as much on pictures. Black in the roots and naturally lighter from the sun in the ends. I keep it that way by always just dying the roots and getting the hairdresser to just drag the colour a bit down so it mixes in naturally with the lighter parts.

I love my new camera by the way, I’m guessing you can see how much better the pictures turn out as well!

Tonight I’m going out again, 1 Oak, but this time I’m gonna meet up with Emma and some of her friends to drink some wine and chill out before that! Girlsnight ❤

And now I actually have a pt session, which I wasn’t too sure about because I’m so damn sore, but I’ll go anyways!

Everyday · personal

The Most Natural You Have Seen Me

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Accurate photo of how I spent my Saturday night. Dan was at work and I was just home chilling – dancing to music while finding outfits for today.

So yeah – I’ve taken some outfit pictures today, and I’ve gotten a new favourite dress! It’s so pretty and I love the colour! Can’t wait to show you guys.

Right now I’m just taking a “break” with some food and coffee (of course), and then Dan and I are going to film a very fun video for you guys! I also did a quick little natural makeup video for you guys earlier today. Showing you my all time favourite makeup product as well!

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Peace out from the most natural version of me ❤ And the one I usually prefer.