Thoughts · traveling

Most Difficult Thing With Long Distance

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Local time LA: 00.58

My bebe sent me flowers and a teddy for my birthday ❤ Such a nice thing to come home to after being out all day celebrating my birthday.

One of the most annoying and difficult things with long distance is communication, especially when you’re both in different timezones. It is such a big thing for a relationship to work and the most important thing I’ve found out is to talk over the phone or on facetime and not send long messages to each other is you’re discussing something, and that’s for every kind of relationship I think… Boyfriend, girlfriend, family… It’s easier understanding each other and making sure the other part is listening to you. I know it always makes things easier with me and Dan.

I now sleep with the teddy and balloon next to me, haha. Cuuute.

Other than that my birthday weekend is officially over and I’m actually okay with that – too much partying isn’t good for me! It has been fun though, it really has. Best night in LA so far must actually have been last night! Having fun with my roomates, meeting new people, experiencing more of LA. Then ending the night/starting the morning with some food from Rise N Grind. Perfect!

I need sleep now!

Photographs · Thoughts · traveling

Dinner With My Roommates

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So last night we went to do some promo for the sushi place, Sushiya, that Katie works for and we all had sushi for dinner! Cozy night. Also a little “fun”fact – earlier this day I had been crying. I’m sharing it because I hate when people act so perfect, and I love when they share something random and honest. Now you might also think “ooh I see it she looks different”, but no there’s just no eye makeup… The times you can tell I’ve been crying you can really tell. There’s been times where my eyes have been so swollen you almost couldn’t see them, hehe.

I have a weird thing – sometimes there’s weeks where I don’t like sushi at all and can’t even eat it, while times like this – since I’ve been in LA – I love it. I think it’s the sushi that I buy from the shop that makes me feel sick, when it’s not that fresh.

Can anyone tell how black my eyes look by the way?? My pupils are always so big except for when I’m in sunlight, and I don’t even know why…

Today is going to be a nice Thursday guys! Katie and I are going around Santa Monica and making a day out of it, and maybe I’ll find a cool outfit as well. Because in the evening we’ll be celebrating my birthday and I’ll be turning 21!! Wow. I’ve been thinking I’m actually going to disconnect from all social media on my birthday, on Friday. I want to just be in the moment and appreciate where I am and what I am doing. It’s so easy to say you’re going to do that, but people always bring up their phone, and especially on their birthdays or special occasions – answering and writing texts, when you should be enjoying the moment. I’ll answer everyone either the day before (because of timezones lol) or the day after. I don’t want to spend any time on social media for that day ❤ Maybe I’ll make it a thing for my birthdays.

personal · Photographs · Thoughts · traveling

It’s My Motivation

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Look how pretty! Katie and I went to this really quiet and calm place in LA some time ago and I saw exactly how I would want it to be the day I wanna settle down. A quiet place in a big city next to the beach and ocean… It’s so weird that I came across it and it was just how I wanted it, all of it. I got the weirdest feeling just looking around but I think I really needed it. Motivation.

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I needed to post this today and I needed to look at the pictures again just because they give me something. It’s not easy when you are timezones away and you feel like you’re not being understood in the way you wish you were. Today I feel like no one understands what’s going on right now (yes I am in LA and super lucky!! But there’s more stuff, pressure and stress being built up), so when people bring me even more instead of understanding me and my words I get really drained and end up wasting a lot of time and energy.

I’m working on getting better at not getting so caught up in it and just stop wasting time trying to make people understand what I see or feel, because it’s just something I can’t always expect.

I believe everything always happens for a reason, and things will work out in my life, no matter what direction it leads me there’s always a reason for it.

I’m so lucky and blessed, and there’s so many struggling and trying to make people understand that you can not keep wasting precious time – you need to love, learn, grow and make time for the ones who gives you positivity in life. And most of all you need to take care of yourself.

I’m gonna make the most out of my day now ❤

Thoughts

I Think You Should Read This

 

can’t be life.

sadly, so many people

are setting the bar really low

in terms of their personal lives

working a job they hate

content with struggling

settling for relationships

life for so many is not living at all

and that’s the problem

you get what you allow

watching others live life

instead of living your best life

and they wonder why everyone

is self-medicating

suppressing their pain

pretending to be happy

instead of trying to cultivate

a lifestyle that brings them peace.

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the control.

and that’s how they control you

they make everything appear impossible

they force you to believe

that you’re almost average at best

they force you to forget about your magic

and with this, you forget about your worth

we are more prone to accept a little

or nothing as opposed to have it all

we’re content with small sums

of what will add up to being without value

in our last days of life

our desire to achieve more

has been buried beneath

the ideals set by those

threatened by an above-average ambition

don’t let them control you

don’t let them define

and or set your limitations

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Poems from whiskey words & a showel

photoshoot · Thoughts · traveling

Instagram Photoshoot

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Looking so innocent and classy 🙂 Two pics from the quick photoshoot I had for a brand’s Instagram the other day.

I have a lot of thoughts right now and I want to write a lot these days, I just have to sit down alone and get in my zone. I am so grateful for the sudden response I got from my previous blogpost here, and I’m so grateful for being able to talk to people via email, Facebook and even Instagram. I hope everyone know they can reach out!

Other than that I had a nice Friday night here in LA, hanging out and eating sushi with friends. I’m so incredibly tired right now though, after not going to sleep until 6.30(!!) this morning. Not because of going out, but neither me or my roommate Katie could fall asleep. And me being me wanting to get things done I still woke up at a decent time today, so I desperately need my sleep right now. Good night from me ❤

personal · Thoughts

Why Didn’t I Talk?

So I know I have had a lot of people come across my blog after this post. My mom posted it in a group on Facebook and showed me all the response which was incredible. Incredible and tough. It was tough to see that there’s so many struggling. I just wanted to let you all know that you can contact me whenever with any questions you have. I’m happy to share more of my experience and how I managed to get better, to answer any questions or just listen.

I’ll share my other platforms here as well if you want to continue and follow my journey or contact me on any of them ❤️

Instagram: @martefre

Facebook: Press here.

Email: fma11824@gmail.com

Youtube: Press here.

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Can’t help but laugh a bit of this pic. Me and the guy that made it so difficult for me to go pursue my dream 🙂

personal · Thoughts · traveling

Positive And Negative Sides To A Long Distance Relationship

Some of you are probably thinking “What, positive? How can there be any positive sides to it?”

So let’s start with the negative things, which I think some of you might have experienced.

  • You can’t be close! It’s starting to get so annoying only looking at Dan but not being able to cuddle or just touch his hair… Lol. He’s like right in front of me on facetime, but still so far away.
  • You can’t do those everyday things together. Like making breakfast, working out, watching series before bed, and just being weird together. That’s a thing I really, really miss 😦
  • Missing out on memories and experiences together. Especially now that I’m in a new place and I know how much he would love it. I experience new things all the time and there’s so many cool things we could do here together. I can tell him about it, but it obviously won’t be the same because it’s not like actually being here.
  • Fear, worry and insecurity. I know this is a big problem in a lot of long distance relationship. “Where is she?” “What is he doing?” It’s so important to communicate with each other and not just sit on the other side of the world overthinking and questioning, instead of talking and bringing up any fears, worries or insecurities. Dan and I talk everyday and even though it is a challenge being so far away from each other, we both do our best to make it as easy as possibly on the other part.
  • Missing anniversaries, birthdays, celebrations… That’s moments where you really want to have your gf or bf next to you and be able to share it with them. So far we weren’t together for our 1 year anniversary and we’re most likely not going to be together for my birthday either (even though I hope so I have to believe it!!)

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❤ Here’s the positive sides to it:

  • You get to find out how strong you are. How powerful the relationship is. If you really love someone you should be able to still be in a relationship even though you’re timezones away. If there is an important reason for the person being away, and the other part not being able to come – we should still make it work and not be selfish about wanting the person to be close all the time when it affects important aspects in their life.
  • You get to miss each other. I never intended to literally start living with Dan so quickly, and not to forget the first months we were staying in his room. And that is a TEST. Living in a room with someone is a lot because you’re in each others space all the time (I need alone time to function properly). I still think everyone needs to breathe and be okay on their own, obviously still in the relationship, but remembering they are their own person. I can be by myself, and do things without him – as he can do as well – and feel even more so how we value each other and care for each other. I think it’s important to be confident in each other and encourage one another to focus on their own things as well.
  • It’s so nice when you see each other again! I can’t wait to see him, and it’s gonna be soooo nice! I think it’s so weird that from the moment I met Dan the longest I have been away from him has literally been two weeks? Like from the moment I saw his face for the first time. That’s crazy to me, lol. Didn’t think I would wanna spend that much time with someone I’m in a relationship with, but there he was.

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